(On the Super Bowl)
Teresa: I think J. Lo is performing with Shakira.
Lina: Shakira? Like the Hips Don’t Lie?
Teresa: (checks phone) Yeah, it’s Shakira.
Lina: What great lyrics. (chuckles) Her hips don’t lie. They don’t!
Author Archives: Irisa
Andy: They do weird things.
Me: Like orgy weird?
Andy: One of the girls has a jar of her own tears.
Mike: (giggles)
Val: …ew.
Homeless man: (yelling) YO, PITBULL’S SICK! He’s not dead!!!
Me: (stares at mustache)
Ray: My eyes are up here!
Val: (reading out loud) “…constant queefing.”
Me: That could be the name of our band.
Em: Making friends, having fun. I could get used to this.
Sinyi: No, no murder for me.
Stan: I already ate all these things. When I eat the toast, it’s going to fall on top of the food that’s already in my stomach and make a sandwich.
Kaili: Estonian caviar: potatoes!!
My Friends Say Things 