Keith: He looks like he lost a lot of money selling crypto.
In-Hye: Who, Devon Booker?
Author Archives: Irisa
Me: Is that dog named Husband?
Gurjant: Okay so, yes. He belongs to a lesbian couple and they thought it would be funny to name their dog Husband.
Ava: Wow, that is such a great idea. People should get euthanized when they do shitty things.
Me: That’s the death sentence, Ava.
Kayvan: She was so confused when you three were going in a room, she was like, where’s Rebecca’s partner?
Becca: We’re never beating the throuple allegations.
(Rack City comes on)
Me: What is this song even about?
Sanila: An abundance of racks.
Kayvan: But then my friend got shot in the leg so we had to stop doing that.
Me: Is he okay now?
Kayvan: He got kinda weird after that.
Me: Well, he got shot in the leg.
Ifath: She looks like a balding old man but she’s a three-year-old girl.
Me: Oh god, is that 3OH!3 looks like now?
Andy: I don’t want to see it.
Me: Nick Cannon has a billion kids.
Sanila: He is the new Genghis Khan.
Becca: How did it get here?
Me: How do we all get here?
Becca: …birth.
Me: Oh, I immigrated.
My Friends Say Things 