Becca: It’s like what they say, you give a man a fish and he’ll starve but if you teach him how to fish… is that how it goes?

(Someone posts Instagram story in front of us)

Becca: It’s like watching the Mona Lisa being painted in real time.

Me: Wagwan!

Becca: Oh god, they got you too.

Becca: These youths and their slime.

Me: Have you ever had poop flung at you and stuff?

Becca: (long pause)

Becca: ….not directly. Not directly.

Becca: Remember that guy I matched with on Hinge then saw at pottery? I saw him just now on the street with his girlfriend!

Me: Crazy Eyes got a girlfriend? Damn.

Me: (sobs)

Becca: What is it? But also yeah.