Ivy: I’m really confused as to how dad typed that in the group chat right now. He’s in the shower.
Author Archives: Irisa
Colleague: She asked me the difference between Austria and Australia, and I almost had an aneurysm.
Jen F: I don’t like Mariah. She sounds like my tea kettle.
Kristina: I need to learn to write with my left hand.
Me: Wait, why?
Kristina: I want to write with both hands. I just want to be skillful.
Ava: That’s exactly what my dad says. He says people that share everything about their lives on Facebook aren’t stable.
Me: January 2019 move-in, I’m assuming?
Andy: My lease starts in eight days. LOL.
Me: LOL.
Andy: It’s fine.
Andy: It’ll be fine.
Andy: It’s fine.
Daryl: Sometimes, I forget Kubi is a boy. Like, in my mind, he is an omnipotent, all-knowing entity that transcends physical existence.
Becca: That’s a real issue though. Hard-boiled eggs make me choke.
Me: Oh yeah, the Dow was down.
Fabienne: “Dow” is more than halfway to “down”, why is everyone surprised?
Dustin: Waterloo has taught me two things: 1. the fear of dying and 2. how to pack my life into a sedan.
My Friends Say Things 