Jenn: Everyone’s gangsta until they touch a wet spot in the cave.
Author Archives: Irisa
Me: “He has Risen.” So he rose from the dead. So he’s a zombie.
Becca: Yes.
(About to enter a club)
Sanila: I think we should learn all the emergency exits, just in case.
Timmy: I actually love turbulence.
Me: You’re a freak.
(At the resort)
Sanila: I want to take this stick of butter home with me.
Me: ….no, goyle.
Guy in Aisle Seat: (turns to me) I think we got lucky.
Guy Entering Middle Seat: The dream dies with me.
Me: No, Shoerack! She broke a shoerack with her face!
Sinyi: I thought she broke a wall.
Jenn: No, that was me.
Don: Disregard my areola comment.
Me: Oh my god, what happened to your back?
Fab: I pulled it…. Doing physio exercises for my fucking left knee.
Andy: LET ME SPEAK MY TRUTH!
Becca: Wait, elaborate.
Andy: No, I will not.
My Friends Say Things 