Me: So how did they meet?
Sinyi: So he posted in an accounting subreddit…
Dustin: It came up on my Instagram Explore and I didn’t understand it and then I was like, ohhh it’s meth.
Me: Mmm, I see.
Ivy: No, you don’t. You don’t have your glasses! Heeheehee!
Anviksha: At this point, you’re having a monologue because I missed everything you just said.
Becker: Do you want a fork?
Me: Oh no it’s okay, I can use my fingies.
Becker: …have a fork.
Barista: (hands coffees over counter) So, I’m incredibly stupid and new here so I switched up the sizes.
Me: Oh my god, don’t call yourself stupid, you’re just new!
Barista: Oh it’s like a self-deprecating comedic thing I do, it’s, like, my personality.
Sinyi: Damn, I have not heard about this secret tea ceremony.
Me: It’s a secret!
Callie: Is that an Uber? Looks like it.
Tina: Is that man a tool? Also looks like it.
Karishma: Who knows belly dancing?
Shonit: Me. When I walk, my belly dances.
Ivy: Anyway, she asked me to be her maid of honour, but she doesn’t even have a boyfriend.
My Friends Say Things 