Me: Are you going to the after party?
Andy: No, I want to sleep.
Me: I know, that’s why you hosted.
(playing Overcooked)
Child: Who is cutting onions and LEAVING THEM THERE?
Chris: I’M SORRY!
Andy: This guy manages Gmail, by the way.
Shawn: It’s still t-shirt weather down here.
Me: Is it still gun violence weather down there too?
Shawn: Ready? (Screams)
Amy: No one was ready for that.
Becca: He was like, I’ve never had a bad interaction with anyone before, and I was like wow, check your privilege.
Chris: This? What is this? This is the list of ingredients for the cake? Sounds like a bowl of oatmeal!
Andy: You don’t get any now.
Chris: That might be okay.
Prit: We go to open houses and spy on the agents for each other.
Dustin: You’ll think about this on a night when there’s nothing to do and think it’s a pretty good idea. Better than dyeing your hair—
Fab: Hey.
Me: Why didn’t you guess tuba?
Scott: Tuba’s wack.
Andy: Ed plays tuba.
Fab: You’re like 15 minutes away from building a bunker.
Me: I would if I could! The good ones are several million.
Fab: You… looked..?
My Friends Say Things 