Andy: I’m like, a 6? Where 12 is blackout?
Me: Oh, so like 50% there.
Andy: I don’t think it’s linear.
Me: Ohhh……….
Author Archives: Irisa
Me: (turns to Mike) I bet she knows more Mandarin than you do.
Sai: (laughs in Chinese)
Don: But my mom is crazy and was like, “I’m going to buy three nail salons.” So that’s what she did. She bought three nail salons.
Dustin: The thing with open marriages is that when one person proposes it, the other person is never like, “That’s a great idea!”
Becca: There’s also some guy laughing to himself right beside me. I’m trying to avoid eye contact because I don’t want to get stabbed.
Daryl: You could have way worse problems.
Me: Yeah, like famine.
Daryl: That’s not where I was going but yeah sure, famine!
Quyen: And then he kissed me and it was all teeth and I was like, uuuhhhhhhhh……
Ivy: Just found a piece of feta cheese.
Me: (turns)
Ivy: On my pants.
Me: (looks down)
Ivy: And ate it.
Rui: You’re not going to find a perfect guy because let’s face it, we’re the perfect ones in their lives.
Me: Okay, let’s go there next time instead.
Kevin: NO! It’s dismal there. It’s like walking into a geriatric ward.
My Friends Say Things 