Andy: Are you telling me you can’t just go onto a subway and pass the fuck out?
Me: Neither sandwich shop nor transit system, no.
Author Archives: Irisa
Me: Hey, what do you want to do for your birthday? Do you wanna… GO OUTSIDE?
Me and Christine: (laughs and laughs and laughs and laughs)
Rachel: (shows me photo of Mateo the cat) All Mateo does is sleep.
Me: Is he depressed?
Rachel: I don’t know, I don’t think I can give him a diagnosis.
Me: I love calamari.
Don: I can tell. They look like onion rings.
Ally: They’re onion rings of the sea.
Becca: There’s so many people trying to sneak into Canada.
Me: Are you serious?
Becca: I saw a clip of these protests at the border, let me find it.
Becca: Oh my god, wait MY BAD LOL. It was for a different protest. Shit, I’ve become one of those aunties that spreads misinformation on WeChat.
Me: [US] oil prices are now negative. It’s cheaper than free.
Christine: SoMeBoDy cOmE gEt hEr
Sean: You have to fight her now, defend my honour.
Sinyi: No, defend your own honour.
Random man: (screams)
Ray: Tacos does that to people.
Kaili: She needs to slow down, have a bath, maybe an orgasm.
Ally: Oh my god, yessss bbg, get that bread.
Ally: And by bread, I mean the enthusiasm for work to better the human condition as a whole.
