Sean: You have to fight her now, defend my honour.
Sinyi: No, defend your own honour.
Author Archives: Irisa
Random man: (screams)
Ray: Tacos does that to people.
Kaili: She needs to slow down, have a bath, maybe an orgasm.
Ally: Oh my god, yessss bbg, get that bread.
Ally: And by bread, I mean the enthusiasm for work to better the human condition as a whole.
Andy: The girl friend dynamic is nothing to be fucked with. What a dangerous game.
Me: What did you do?
Andy: NOTHING.
Andy: I am but an observer.
Me: …
Andy: I’VE SEEN SOME SHIT. Y’all wilin’ sometimes.
Mike: Just kidding, I love you. (gives me middle finger)
Quyen: Watching boomers do video calls is so precious.
Don: So my friend has a fashion brand and it’s called Legends League.
Don: And I asked him if it was based off League of Legends and he asked me to leave.
Dilsher: I can read street signs.
Me: So you’re literate, you’ll be fine.
Sanila: He also ran out of money on his presto, so he has to walk.
(On video call during quarantine)
Me: Oh yeah, I’ve just been dissociating a lot.
Fabienne: Even over video chat?
Me:
Fabienne: …come back…
My Friends Say Things 