Me: Was my wedding hair giving Amish man sideburns?
Andy: I’m not going to entertain this conversation.
Author Archives: Irisa
Becca: I’ve never heard that song before. I’m the first of my bloodline.
Andrew: His name was Tasobellis and he looked like a guy we worked with that was obsessed with Taco Bell.
Me: Was he Pitbull [for Halloween]?
In-Hye: Our bald friend called Keith out for cultural appropriation.
Me: You don’t know who Future is?
Khalil: No.
Me: Mask Off? Percocet, molly, percocet?
Khalil: No.
Kaili: I was just thinking, if I was buying a house and the apocalypse happens, I’m going to be so upset. I’m never going to financially recover from this, like wow.
Retired man at bar: 6-7, 6-7!
Becca: I was gonna be Pitbull but it’s too hard to get a bald cap these days.
Me: What did you just say?
Andy: I’m going to soul-read your LLM.
Becca: (pushing luggage trolley) Oh, this is all wheel drive, nice.
My Friends Say Things 