Sanila: Harry Styles really died [off].
Me: Maybe his hairline started receding and that was the end of his career.
Sanila: Harry no styles.
Author Archives: Irisa
Andy: What was your old wallet before?
Me: This. (pulls out old coin purse)
Andy: (revolted) EW, YOU WERE USING THAT?
Linda: That store’s price tags are double digits but the quality is single digit.
Kaili: (to me) Don’t tumble, little one. Things will get better.
Brittany: No they won’t, adulting sucks.
Kaili: BRITTANY!
Jasmine: Wanna hear a funny story? I got drunk off kombucha last week.
Dustin: The only reason somebody would commit to him is to fast track becoming a Tibetan monk. I literally cannot derive another cause.
Daryl: Shut up.
Me: You shut up.
Daryl: Shut up.
Me: You shut up.
Fabienne: Yeah, like check yourself.
Me: Before you wreck yourself.
Fabienne: Yeah. Or I’ll wreck you.
(Sees inflatable hot dog strapped against a wire fence)
Becca: What religion is this?
Jenn: It means something when on your commute, you realize you don’t hate going to work.
