Zoe: Oh my god, did my landlord just ask me if I’m up?
Author Archives: Irisa
Me: Are you okay?
Rui: I’M GOOD. But it’s everyone else that is a mess right now.
Becca: Medjool dates are my fave kind of dates.
Timmy: (shouts into abyss) ALEXA, STOP.
(group cheers)
Anviksha: Happy Wednesday! Oh yuck, I hate we’ve become those people. There’s nothing happy about it.
Harry: Every time I went to Tim Hortons, she called me a peasant.
Calvin: Damn, I apologize on behalf of guys out there… Men can be real assholes.
Calvin: If you need to know one self defense move, it’s called the nut punch – highly effective.
Ashley: Ya, IDK, whatevs. I’ll just be single forever and get a dog.
(Lining up for pizza)
Man in Car: (shouts) ALL THIS FOR PIZZA?
Line: Yeah.
Man in Car: HOW MUCH?
Line: $3.
Man in Car:
Man in Car: ……..oh fuck, pull over, pull over.
Me: It’s a…. FUN Friday, guys.
Loren: Except that it’s not.
My Friends Say Things 