Candice: I farted during the Skype meeting and saw my volume meter go up. I couldn’t talk because I was laughing too hysterically. I’m not built to work from home.
Author Archives: Irisa
Dustin: On a side note, I love how we can search “Microsoft racist Twitter bot” and it’s still a valid search query.
Me: I’m concerned. There is something wrong with him if he is 6’3″, a doctor and single at 39.
Quyen: Yeah, there is. He’s an only child, narcissistic at times, [has] daddy issues.
Quyen: But isn’t he beautiful?
Me: Oh my god.
(On a video call)
Fabienne: Is that a filter? Please tell me that’s a filter. Or is that how you look now?
Tina: OH GOD, I HATE NIPPLE RINGS! (buries face in hands)
Don: In the wise words of Judge Judy, “Beauty fades. Dumbness is forever.”
Me: See how smart your daughters are?
Mom: Obviously, you came from me.
Ava: I was thinking the second this is over, I’m never rejecting a date again.
Dustin: My bar for the moment is if nothing catches fire, you are thriving.
Sinyi: Yeah, Sean promised me we would tidy next weekend.
Sean: …..shit.
