Me: NOOOOOOOOOOO!
Christine: What?
Me: I accidentally pressed an ad for DIAPERS!!!! Now Google is going to think I HAVE A BABY!!!!!!
Christine: NOOOOOOOOOO!
Author Archives: Irisa
Me: Did you just flex your butt?
Ray: Yes.
Dustin: IT’S A TRAP! But I mean, if you’re falling into it, I don’t mind having company here.
Kristina: I have an enemy named Christina because as you remember, my life’s a joke.
Me: Durian.
Mom: NO, NO, NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT.
Me: I don’t know why, but this just adds to this feeling of uneasiness that I have.
Christine: I have that too. It’s called anxiety.
Rui: You even dressed for the occasion!
Me: I did, thank you for noticing!
Rui: Why wouldn’t I notice an outfit? What do you think I am, straight?
Anthony: I just feel bad for them.
Me: Why?
Anthony: Because they think Pizza Pizza is good.
(phone buzzes)
Christine: OOOH, booty call?
Me: No, UberEats.
Me: I once found him off a simple detail he mentioned on Hinge.
Fabienne: Abolish the police, let Irisa replace the entire Investigations unit.
My Friends Say Things 