Anu: I met a white guy that smelled like curry and I was very confused.
Author Archives: Irisa
Henry: (taking photo) Your eyes are closed.
Dustin: No, trust me, they’re open.
Kaili: (jokingly) I’ve been in prison before and I’m not afraid to go back.
Kaili: Actually, that’s not entirely untrue.
Me: Yeah, and then maybe I’ll trick some dude into marrying and providing for me. Then I just won’t move anymore.
Kristina: Hearing you say these things make me so proud. I know we haven’t known each other that long, but I feel like I’ve had a good influence on you.
Timmy: (cuts open bell pepper) How can something so beautiful on the outside be so ugly on the inside?
Me: Wait, am I really that weird?
Henry: Well, you’re not normal, let’s just say that.
Jess: Oh ma GAWD, I’m ordering that too guuuuuurl!!
Me: I told you what I was ordering!
Jess: Oh WHAT! Oh sorry, I wasn’t listening. I was just like, “oh ya ya”.
Amy: When you wake up with fake lashes stuck to your hair but you didn’t wear any out.
Me: I’m taking you down a path of certainty.
Sinyi: …that was creepy. What are you, an old hag from a video game?
Me: Guys, don’t die!
Amanda: LIKE WE HAVE CONTROL OVER THAT!
My Friends Say Things 