Ivy: Why are you telling me this? I’m not stupid.
Ariel: Yeah, you are.
Me: I’ll go if you go.
Daryl: Come! I got your back if you smack her.
Daryl: We’ll start a bar fight, break glass bottles and hold the place up.
Hani: G-O H-O-M-E.
Kelly: I just heard M-E.
Me: I just heard H-O.
Hani: What am I supposed to say to that.
Us: How’s your food?
Mojan: It had snow peas but was called “Summer Ravioli” so like, what’s the truth really?
Daryl: Fuck children. Down to have pets ’til I die.
Andy: Look at that kid climbing beside you, she’s having so much fun.
Qiqi: That’s just ’cause she hasn’t learned fear yet.
Me: Why do you look like that?
Ivy: There’s a pathetic sour key in here. Look, it doesn’t even look like a key.
(at a club for his birthday)
Me: Why are you sad?
Julius: Because life is sad.
Me: Do you want a drink—
Julius: (abruptly) Do you know what I care about? Do you know what I care about?!
Julius: INTEREST RATES.
Sanila: You can’t be an asshole AND ugly!! That’s not okay!
Me: What are they looking at?
Jason: I don’t know.
Andy: There wasn’t any meaning in this conversation, so I was trying to look for some.
My Friends Say Things 