Kristina: You just gotta do you, boo. Forever and always.
Author Archives: Irisa
Jess: Guys, GUYS, he has another story. Like this guy’s FUGLY but HE GETS ALL THE GIRLS.
Sanila: She was like, “I wanted to go to Shake Shack” and that was the main reason she got her passport.
(On Justin Bieber’s “One Less Lonely Girl”)
Amy Z: I genuinely thought this was a girl. I was like, damn that is SO progressive.
Quyen: My mom thought I got plastic surgery on my face, but I just lost weight. She saw me and was like, “did you get your cheeks done?” I was like, “Mom no. I’m a broke-ass student. I just lost weight.”
Me: (sings)
Ivy: Stop, you’re actually hurting me.
Sinyi: Oh, what did you get your second degree in?
Jerry: Eh, does it really matter?
Eva: Good answer, because it doesn’t do shit.
Me: Well, you bring up a good point.
Kristina: Well, I’m super smart, Irisa.
Kristina: You’re welcome.
Sinyi: Are you ready to sweat your balls off?
Rudder: Not the words I needed to hear right now.
(On New Year’s Resolutions)
Sanila: I keep mine very realistic. Like, “don’t lose the same bobby pins for at least two weeks.” And look, I didn’t lose them! They’re still the same ones!
