Kaili: He’s so even-keeled.
Us: (looks at each other)
Kaili: I’m probably gonna fuck that up.
Kaili: He’s so even-keeled.
Us: (looks at each other)
Kaili: I’m probably gonna fuck that up.
Isaac: Kale. Toilet paper for your insides.
(reads cover of Bloomberg Businessweek)
Brittany: Oh yeah, I guess it has been 10 years since the meltdown.
Me: But only one week since mine!
Both: (high five)
Angela: And you’ll have to send the note early in the morning. Every day.
Me: (starts laughing)
Angela: Including weekends. And holidays.
Me: (laughs harder)
Angela: I’m not joking.
Angela: Stop laughing.
Timmy: EW, don’t call him Wagyu beef, he’s more like flank steak.
Becca: So how’s your life going?
Daryl: Can’t complain, still alive.
(Child screams in restaurant)
Me: Same.
Kaili: I can relate.
Chris: I like your (points at eyelid) mascara. Makeup. Blush. Rouge.
Me: Eyeshadow.
Chris: Nailed it.
Sinyi: New information, new decisions.
Linda: And I was like, I appreciate the honesty and I’m not surprised and I’m sad I’m not surprised.