Ray: They also got a new cat, which they made me follow on Instagram. His or her name is Snow Pea.
Tag Archives: Ray
Ray: So I have this bottle of wine in my fridge.
Me: Let’s pop it.
Ray: No, we’re going to stare at it and wonder what it tastes like.
Me: (stares at mustache)
Ray: My eyes are up here!
Me: What am I doing with my life?
Ray: I ask myself that four to five times a day.
Ray: Happy Friday! I’m almost at 70K unread emails.
Me: Hey, can I tell you a secret?
Ray: No.
Ray: You’re going to burp in my ear, aren’t you?
Ray: (gets a pedicure)
Me: Do you feel like a new man?
Ray: The lady said I had beautiful nail beds. So yes. Yes, I do.
My Friends Say Things 