Kevin: So I crushed my clip-ons.
Me: NO!
Kevin: Yeah, but it was half-way between save-able and too late… So I can still use it, but I would be running on a monocle.
Kevin: So I crushed my clip-ons.
Me: NO!
Kevin: Yeah, but it was half-way between save-able and too late… So I can still use it, but I would be running on a monocle.
Me: Should I get the cakes?
Kevin: (writes down order for cakes)
Me: Hehehe.
Kevin: Hehehe.
Me: Hehehe.
Kevin: Hehehe.
Kevin: So recently, I discovered that if I mix my vanilla whey protein with juice, it tastes like a creamsicle.
Ivy: That is literally my worst nightmare.
Me: I almost choked and shat myself at the same time.
Me: (forgets to clip one fingernail)
Kevin: Well, if it makes you feel any better, some people intentionally leave one fingernail long for—
Me: Oh yeah, cocaine and boogers!
Kevin:
Me:
Kevin: …boxes…
Me: You went to The Keg and you got salmon?
Kevin: Ya!
Iris: (turns to me) It looked like it physically hurt you to say that.
Iris: Where are those shot glasses I bought for you from Peru?
Kevin: Oh, okay!
Kevin: Well, he’s too preoccupied learning how to use Outlook. So in a way, we’re okay. But in a way, we’re not okay. Because he’s our manager.
Kevin: You can’t be needy and destructive at the same time.
Ivy: They’re synonymous.
Me: Oooooooh mic drop.
Kevin: Ever think it’s called sand because it’s between land and sea?
(Three months after Ivy started working)
Kevin: SO, did you ever get that job?