Me: It’s like that book, If you give a mouse a cookie.
Ivy: I never read it. Is the mouse a bitch?
Tag Archives: Ivy
Ivy: I named a chicken after you on Stardew Valley. She’s doing great. I can sell her for $10K.
Ivy: Yeah, this girl was very anti-technology, she had a flip phone. Anyway, she moved to Nova Scotia and gave it to me.
Ivy: Mom said to socialize with more people, not cats.
Ivy: And the feds were on her side?
Me: The feds are always on the criminal’s side, Ivy.
Ivy: The feds ARE the criminals, Irisa.
Mom: I’m a Trader Joe bitch.
Ivy: Mom!
Ivy: And that’s what you are. Diarrhea girl. That’s all you do. Work and have diarrhea.
Ivy: Are you twitching?
Iris: She’s chewing.
Me: I’M SMILING.
Me: It’s almost the end of the year.
Ivy: Oh, I thought you were gonna say end of the—
Kevin: Tencent?
Ivy: —the world.
Kevin: Oh.
Ivy: Oh.
Ivy: My horoscope said by next spring, I should be secure enough to start building wealth.
Me: Is it true in terms of numbers?
Ivy: Iunno.
My Friends Say Things 