Don: We don’t find it necessary to scream at the top of our lunges the love we have for them.

Me: I know you mean lungs, but I just imagined us lunging and screaming.

Don: He was asking for the map. To your heart.

Me: He can’t have it. It’s in your possession.

Don: Oh my word.

Don: Look at how wide that bed is. Wide bed for wide activities. Like manspreading!!

Me: She wouldn’t shut up. And this is coming from me, I don’t shut up.

Don: This is true. That’s a lot.

Don: I have a complicated order.

Me: It’s okay, you’re a complicated person.

Don: You’re right.

Don: She asks the right questions at the wrong time, which is why I like her.

Don: In the wise words of Judge Judy, “Beauty fades. Dumbness is forever.”